Emotions are Not Meant to Be Professionals
2021 has started, and for some reason, most of my friends on Social Media were looking forward to this new year in hopes that 2021 will be better than 2020. What immediately came to my mind was how can we be looking forward to something we can't be sure about. Talking about this with some friends, the topic of emotional intelligence was brought up. The most resilient people are those with high Emotional Intelligence.
We all know that emotions are powerful forces. Historically we have seen emotions start wars and build peace; it has sparked love and induced divorce. While unavoidable, emotions are what push us to take action. A relief, though, is that Emotional intelligence is not a fixed ability. With training and practice in some key areas, you can improve your emotional intelligence, even at work.
DEVELOP SELF-AWARENESS
The first is to develop greater Self-Awareness. Learn how to recognize your own emotions and to understand what is causing them. I remember my father always telling me that he can see immediately whenever I haven't had a good night's sleep due to my lack of patience, motivation, and/or endurance. Demonstrating just one of the aspects that immediately influence me during the day. But knowing what caused me to feel or react in a certain way provides me with the ability to change it.
PRACTICE SELF-REGULATION
Secondly, practice Self-Regulation. Practice responding to situations with a range of emotions in a socially tolerable and sufficiently flexible manner to permit spontaneous reactions and the ability to delay spontaneous reactions as needed. This one has been the most difficult for me, personally. But with greater self-awareness, it becomes easier to recognize my feelings and try to calm me before reacting impulsively.
BUILD MOTIVATION
Another critical aspect is motivation. Many expect extrinsic motivating factors to be enough to push them towards action. But high emotional intellectuals are those who can cultivate their intrinsic motivation. To build your intrinsic motivation, focus on the aspects of your job that you love. Recognize the tasks or challenges that satisfy or fulfill you regardless of the extrinsic rewards you may get for them.
PUT YOURSELF IN OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES
Work on putting yourself in another person's shoes to understand how they feel, and then choose how to respond to conversations and situations with that insight in mind. This skill is essential when conflicts arise at work. Social skills and emotional intelligence often go hand in hand. The ability to recognize other people's emotions helps those with high emotional intelligence to respond appropriately. Thus, tune-up your social skills by actively listening to others, paying attention to nonverbal communication, looking for ways to solve problems, and minimizing tensions when conflicts arise.
LEAD BY EXAMPLE
For leaders at work, it is essential to lead by example. Prioritize emotional intelligence. Contrary to what previous generations may have believed, people can't turn off their emotions when working. Remove preconceived notions about what a boss is supposed to do and approach every situation with an emotional intelligence perspective. Getting angry, yelling at your staff may not be the best behavior to show always. Get to know your team and request feedback. Find out how your behavior is impacting your team and work together on improving your emotional awareness.
